Skirt: Thrift find, Top: Nordstrom Rack, Booties: Charlotte Russe, Hat: H&M, Pearl Necklace/Bracelet: Thrift finds, Sunnies: Free People, Lipstick: MAC
Top: Free People, Shorts: American Apparel, Wedges: ALDO, Headpiece: Urban Outfitters, Sunnies: Stella McCarthy, Lipstick: MAC
So I’m finally back on track and it feels like bliss. It’s a baby pink cloud I’m floating on really. It really takes demanding effort to tell yourself, “this hole you’re sitting in, is yes very familiar and comfortable but familiar and comfortable isn’t your style lady!’ So with that said I’ve managed to put myself on an eating and mild exercise schedule as well as started applying for places to volunteer at. I feel I need to have a purpose where I feel I’m giving back because right now I just feel stuck and not too hot about myself. I know it’s a temporary feeling and things like school, a job, helping others, and things along those lines of giving me a sense of accomplishment will really enrich my life. Not to mention that it will give me a routine and as a bipolar 1 individual that is essential if not I’ll keep falling off the boat.
I don’t feel ready for a demanding job and as much as that makes me feel like poop, I’ve radically accepted it and am taking steps in doing something that can ease that shitty feeling. Not that I already haven’t. It just feels that having photo shoots, blogging, reading, practicing yoga, watching movies, going to festivals, and going for walks just doesn’t feel productive. All those things help and they give me glimpses of peace and happiness but I don’t get the whole enchilada, and ultimately that’s what I’m hungry for. Little by little I’ll get there. I’m just so nervous I’m almost 22 years old and I’m still so dependent on my parents. I want to rely only on myself but that on its own paralyzes me with fear. What if I can’t handle it? What if….I have so many what ifs, it’s not even worth going through all of them. I’ll only throw myself into the panic zone.
Anyways for these set of outfits I was thinking ensembles for a whimsical Easter day. I know Easter is long past but I love the soft, pastel colors the holiday is composed of. That and this season is trending with pastel colors. Mardi’s fair skin inspired a soft on the eyes and classic look with and off white pleated skirt, an aquamarine, green, and white body con crop top, baby blue booties, a pearl necklace and bracelet, and a light tanned hat. I gave color to her lips to create a focal point. The look is innocent but full of subtle sex appeal.
I put myself in an easy to put together outfit. I went with a very hippie/bohemian off white long sleeved shirt with beautiful flower embroidery going down the center. The sleeves were loose and full of movement. As bottoms I went with simple black lace shorts and to strut in I went with beige and tan wedges. I hardly wear heels or wedges these days. I’m become all about comfort and practicality since moving to the city, Before, I was that girl that “couldn’t think in flat shoes,” now I can’t get around without them. Talk about change. If I can change in that realm why not in others right?
“I was really flattered when Juanna asked me to model for her. I’ve struggled with body image issues for as long as I can remember and felt a lack of confidence. But, this experience was really fun and enlightening. I not only felt beautiful, but a whole array of positive thoughts enveloped me. I feel one step closer to letting go of myself and loving to my full potential. Thank you, Juanna for such a great experience!”